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Posts Tagged ‘TSA’

Isn’t it funny how US customs doesn’t ask why you’ve returned home after a trip? I mean, when you leave you need a reason to visit other countries, but returning? Not so much. We actually did customs in Calgary – I stood before a camera-type-I-pad device that snapped a picture and then said “Welcome Christine!” Weird! Since we are Global Entry screened, it almost seemed too easy. Where are the harried agents looking you up and down and asking if you have anything to declare?

YES. I declare that despite the cold and the rain, Canadians seem happier than Americans – and it wasn’t just the Blue Jays win!

I came back from our Vancouver Island adventure smuggling pockets full of snotty tissues. Our very last day in British Columbia I woke with a tickle in my throat, thank you Bob who had been coughing for days. This didn’t stop us hopping onboard a water taxi to search out the best fish and chips on Fisherman’s Wharf. We were on a mission. Have you ever watched the PBS show, “Samantha Brown’s Places to Love?” Well I’m addicted.

There’s just something about her generosity of spirit that makes hers a travel show worth watching. And since I hope that you, like my family, are contributors to public broadcasting, you’ll be able to stream all her work on PBS Passports. Anyhow, she did a piece on Victoria, BC that had us taking mad notes! We visited a jigsaw puzzle shop she recommended that featured local artists’ work all in wood and ordered two to be delivered home – one of an orca whale with all the tiny pieces resembling a whale!

We walked in from the rain, and I said I’d expected their shop to be on a small side street; the lovely saleswoman told me that after Samantha’s visit (who is also lovely of course), they’d had to move to a larger place on the main street. https://puzzlelab.com/

After our delicious fishy lunch, we hopped onboard another water taxi to visit Chinatown. This is the oldest Chinatown in North America and it didn’t disappoint. Of course we’d already gone whale watching earlier in the week, and managed to spy an elusive sea otter, along with lots of seals and a few humpback whales. One was identified as “Exclamation” because of his gigantic exclamation point on his tail. Most have migrated south by this time, preferring the warmer waters of Mexico for calving.

I remembered Ada’s 90th Birthday Bash in Cabo; the tiny motorboat we piled into to see mama whales and babies cavorting. At least in BC, the Prince of Whales was a much bigger boat and they served us hot chocolate!

My cold is finally getting better, but I’ve been quarantined from our little Nashville family for a week. So I had to leave the otter socks, lumberjack PJs, and books I got for the Grands on their porch. Like the tiny porcelain cat I found in Chinatown, my arm is perpetually waving across the distance.

Like this administration, a government unfunded, pulling away from our closest trade neighbor. Now Canada too is looking towards Asia. “Faced with a trade war with the United States, Canada’s biggest trading partner, Mr. Carney has set an ambitious goal of doubling Canadian exports to other countries within a decade. Expanding trade with Asia is central to Mr. Carney’s strategy.” NYTimes.

Here I am in my Victorian “Elsbeth” hat and a vintage green, cashmere sweater I found at the Crossroads Pets’ fundraiser. We were so cold people!

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If you’re not traveling by air this holiday season, or ever, this post is not for you.

But if you do find yourself squashing all your earthly belongings into one tiny carry-on, that you have to gate check anyway, all the while wondering if it’s worth it; standing behind a passenger in the security lane who “forgot” to pack her liquids separately; waiting while a person goes through the metal detector yet another time until he finds that nickel in his pocket. Line after line of  irate elders and squabbling children, like a Disneyland line to the outer limits of your sanity. Fear not. The airline industry is offering its fine, upstanding citizens a way around this mess.

It’s called Global Entry along with its caveat TSA Pre-Check! http://petergreenberg.com/2013/08/20/global-entry-vs-tsa-pre-check-which-is-worth-it/

Here’s the deal. If you manage to apply for this program online, which amounts to a criminal background check, you will be called in to your nearest international airport for a mini-inquisition with a TSA/Police?Immigration and Border Control-type guy. This week Bob and I made the cut. We drove two hours to Dulles and waited around a corridor along with other people awaiting their future – wary travelers like us mixed in with some who may or may not be allowed to enter the US. Tension was running high, then they called my name – Bob said he’d see me later.

The young man in uniform asked me to take a seat and look into the camera. There was no, “How was your drive?” “Nice day today isn’t it” I tried to smile at the round lens while handing him my passport and driver’s license. He got right to the point,

“Did you ever use a different last name?” I was ready for this, “Yes,” I replied, “I was married before for 4 years in 1969 and had a different last name.” I had to place my fingertips on a digital pad because I was being fingerprinted. “Not like the old days,” I said, then instantly regretted. “You know I had to be fingerprinted with ink back in the day…when I was teaching…” I was already starting to blush, feeling guilty for no reason.

“What’s this name?” he said, rather adamantly, ignoring my whole soliloquy. He was pointing out my maiden name, the one I was born with. Curses, I forgot about that one. And then, looking down at his computer, the ballistic questioning began:

“Have you ever been charged with a crime?” “No” Have you ever been arrested?” “No” But isn’t that the same thing I wondered.

“Have you ever had a DUI?” “NO”

“Ever got a speeding ticket?” “No” Finally he looks up, right into my eyes and says “Are you sure, you never got a speeding ticket?” Now I’m not so sure, have I? I must have gotten a speeding ticket at some time. “Well maybe I might have gotten a speeding ticket a long time ago, a very long time ago…”

I’m beginning to understand why people confess to crimes they never committed. As Bob and I were walking out of the airport I apologized for spoiling our chances at seamlessly going through security lines in the future. There will be no fancy fast lane for us; never having to take off our shoes, keeping our coats and scarves on forever more. Oh no, we were destined to line up like chattel. I was sure I’d flunked my test, ruined our chances at Global Entry.

Bob waiting/napping @ Dulles Airport

Bob waiting/napping @ Dulles Airport

Then Bob called me and said we’re in. Guess I’m not such a criminal after all?

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