Posts Tagged ‘Ellen DeGegeneres’

Slut shaming, it’s nothing new. Long before that Rush ‘to judgement’ Limbaugh called Sandra Fluke a “slut” on his radio show, young women everywhere have been objectified and marginalized for ages. Think of the adulterous “A”  sewn onto Hester Prynne’s bodice, now think of the “walk of shame” I first heard about when the kids went off to college. If you haven’t heard about it, ask a twenty something. I remember feeling pained even then, we “Our Bodies Ourselves” feminists burned our bras for what?

Now it’s back with a vengeance – the public humiliation of a young woman for embracing her sex. Yes, I’m talking about 20 year old Miley Cyrus, and isn’t everyone else? The Rocker and Cait first filled me in on the controversy between Miley and Sinead O’Connor last weekend. Odd I thought. One rocker who chopped all her hair off and ripped up a picture of the Pope 2 decades ago vs the Wrecking Ball baby. I missed her stellar performance on SNL, but did catch Miley on Ellen this week, doing her best to explain her fascination with her own tongue (turns out she just hates smiling on the red carpet) and her love of wearing onesies, oh and teddy bears. And this morning I read a great new blogger’s take on the whole shebang, http://fishershannon.wordpress.com/2013/10/06/the-s-word/

The problem with the word “slut” is that we don’t have a male equivalent. It’s like the French don’t have a word for “snack.” It’s because they just don’t do it, no fast food, no eating in the car, no walking down the street with coffee in hand. Nope, the French sit down and savor every single morsel of food and drink. Let’s think for a minute, what if we did have a derogatory term for a man who was enjoying his body and didn’t mind having a little sexual fun with it, no regrets. What would it be? Player, no since this is gender neutral. Manwhore, no since the whole whore part is female specific. Sex addict, maybe. Hmmm, a promiscuous man. “A single young man who sleeps readily with a number of women would probably not have any label attached to his behavior.” http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/fighting-fear/201302/certain-aspects-promiscuity

Slut first appeared in the written language in 1402, according to the Oxford English Dictionary , that great repository of language information. At that time, slut meant roughly what one sense of slattern  means today: a slovenly, untidy woman or girl. It also apparently meant “kitchen maid” (”She is a cheerful slut who keeps the pots scrubbed and the fires hot.”). By the end of the 15th century the sense “a woman given to immoral or improper conduct” had come into use, and it is the only meaning in use today. Interestingly,the same second meaning, a promiscuous woman, developed for the term slattern. dictionary.com

So Miley isn’t writing songs about her old boyfriends who we must presume she’d been intimate with a la Taylor Swift. Taylor, who mostly keeps her clothes on is still rather boy crazy. Miley didn’t fade into the woodwork, like Annette our first Mouseketeer. She twerked her way into America’s pop culture, for better or worse, with her mother in the background signing her checks. And taking a selfie with the signature “tongue and wink” move in this AP pic.Miley Cyrus, Tish Cyrus

My brother Dr Jim, the psychologist, called Ms Miley a master marketing strategist, and I have to agree. So stop feeling sorry for her America, she refuses to be shamed into submission. And let’s drop the word slut from the Oxford English dictionary. After Britney’s brief affair with a boa, and Madonna’s many semi-nudist and full frontal nudist concerts and picture books, and Cher, and Lady Gaga, Miley romping around in a teddy bear outfit that covered her like a one piece bathing suit with a foam finger is pretty tame, or lame, depending on your point of view. Let’s get off our puritanical white horse…and wink back.24176_1250095808770_946372_n



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A funny thing happens when you leave your husband and your life behind and move in with your daughter and her new family for 3 weeks. It’s like I stepped into a time warp. Instead of CNN with my morning coffee, I played with the Love Bug during her “Happy Awake” time…then we’d have her “Musical Giraffe Interlude” followed by her nap and maybe I’d throw in some laundry. After the next nursing cycle, weather permitting, we might go out for a brisk dog walk in her Bob (that’s a stroller). And on and on my days would follow the sweet rhythm of life at home with a newborn. Imagine my surprise when I turned on CNN yesterday morning to pack for my return trip home, and found out the world may actually be coming to an end.

As you know, NPR is hard to find in the long state of TN but I did listen to a few programs about the new season on TV (boring) and a Black comedian on FX.http://www.npr.org/2012/09/13/161073894/totally-biased-comic-on-race-politics-and-audience – Nobody deserves to be shot, thank you W. Kamau Bell!

Nobody deserves to be shot. I hope you listened to Bell’s Dr Seuss-like rant about the difference between a sheik and a sikh. It is genius and I am now committed to watching his show “Totally Biased.” When he does his stand-up act, you can get a 2 for 1 ticket if you bring someone of another race with you. If only those 9 Arab countries that have decided to try and storm our embassies and burn our flag over a film…an internet film I still know nothing about and actually refuse to search for…if only they could defy their censors and watch a little bit of Bell comedy. Maybe the new generation might decide that killing for the sake of religion is absurd? And that nobody deserves to be shot, or stoned, or have any other biblical punishment rain down on them…because it’s 2012 people.

“A lot of times people think comedy is making fun of things, and I feel like, no, it can also just be making fun out of things,” Bell says. “That, to me, is the kind of comedy I always like to do, where you can make jokes about the thing without making fun of the thing.” Like when Ellen said at the Oscars after 9/11 that what would piss off Al Quaeda more than a gay woman in a suit entertaining a room full of Jews? Or maybe my Jewish folktale on 9/11? Almost everyone knows what it’s like to bring home a new baby. Humor hits our humanity’s funny bone.

It is a subtle difference, but a very important one! Goodbye for now little Love Bug. Nana will be back soon and we’ll discuss comedy.

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